How my life became a case for Judge Judy...pain, heartbreak and humiliation
Ok, this is going to be hard. However, I (with Carrie's full support) felt that I had to talk about this on Cheap Women. So, here goes. It is very emotional for me, so I am not sure how clearly or succinctly it will come out. deep breath.
For those of you reading Broke Bride, you know that my wedding has been called off. Now you will know why.
My fiance was (and I believe still is) abusing drugs. I found out b/c he was stealing money from me. My bank account is now -$750 and my heart is broken. I have also lost a family heirloom to a pawn shop in town.
Looking back, it is so obvious, but at the time it was not. He was borrowing money from me for reasons that seemed legit, and his lost job seemed reasonable. Between everything he borrowed and everything he took, I am out $3460. That is a lot for anyone, especially a single woman in debt and in the middle of a job change.
I don't regret anything, from the quick engagement to loaning him money for reasons that I thought were good. I opened my heart and tried to love a man. I don't doubt that he loved me...the addiction was (and is) stronger than any ties.
Drugs kill everything. I have seen them wreak havok on so many lives. What is sad about this is that the drug he is addicted to is one that is given to cancer patients (which he was) for pain. So what starts as a heartbreaking thing, cancer, becomes a life-long struggle and has ruined his life. I cannot tell you how hard it is to tell the police that you have been robbed by the man you were going to marry. Or to decide if you want to go to pawn shops to look for the ring he took (I am not, it is too hard). Or to tell people that your wedding is off, and the reasons why. Or to post it in a blog about money, now that he has taken all of yours.
Luckily, his family is going to help me financially. There is also a process you can go through at the bank to dispute charges. I may have to appear before a court. Not too mention the pain of having the family I was going to have ripped out from under me.
I am not asking for pity. I truly believe that I did what God was calling me to do in every situation, and I am not sure why He allowed this to happen, but I know that it is for something. What I am asking for is to remember that money is just money, and you can lose it in a second. I am so glad that I have had these last 4 months to look at my money and spending, so this seems bad, but not nearly as bad as it would have 4 months ago. Money is powerful, but not as powerful as it used to be in my life.
Well, I would venture a guess that Carrie is probably going to win now. Oh well, losing this contest is the least of what I have lost this Christmas.
For those of you reading Broke Bride, you know that my wedding has been called off. Now you will know why.
My fiance was (and I believe still is) abusing drugs. I found out b/c he was stealing money from me. My bank account is now -$750 and my heart is broken. I have also lost a family heirloom to a pawn shop in town.
Looking back, it is so obvious, but at the time it was not. He was borrowing money from me for reasons that seemed legit, and his lost job seemed reasonable. Between everything he borrowed and everything he took, I am out $3460. That is a lot for anyone, especially a single woman in debt and in the middle of a job change.
I don't regret anything, from the quick engagement to loaning him money for reasons that I thought were good. I opened my heart and tried to love a man. I don't doubt that he loved me...the addiction was (and is) stronger than any ties.
Drugs kill everything. I have seen them wreak havok on so many lives. What is sad about this is that the drug he is addicted to is one that is given to cancer patients (which he was) for pain. So what starts as a heartbreaking thing, cancer, becomes a life-long struggle and has ruined his life. I cannot tell you how hard it is to tell the police that you have been robbed by the man you were going to marry. Or to decide if you want to go to pawn shops to look for the ring he took (I am not, it is too hard). Or to tell people that your wedding is off, and the reasons why. Or to post it in a blog about money, now that he has taken all of yours.
Luckily, his family is going to help me financially. There is also a process you can go through at the bank to dispute charges. I may have to appear before a court. Not too mention the pain of having the family I was going to have ripped out from under me.
I am not asking for pity. I truly believe that I did what God was calling me to do in every situation, and I am not sure why He allowed this to happen, but I know that it is for something. What I am asking for is to remember that money is just money, and you can lose it in a second. I am so glad that I have had these last 4 months to look at my money and spending, so this seems bad, but not nearly as bad as it would have 4 months ago. Money is powerful, but not as powerful as it used to be in my life.
Well, I would venture a guess that Carrie is probably going to win now. Oh well, losing this contest is the least of what I have lost this Christmas.
4 Comments:
I am so sorry Elisa. This breaks my heart.
Elisa, I don't know you, but I've been reading your blog for quite a while. I just wanted to let you know I'm praying for you.
Thank you everyone for your support. I really do appreciate it.
Kelly, I know you are hurting from this to, and I am so sorry.
Dawn, Thanks for the prayers...I need them right now.
elisa, i don't know you either, so i feel a bit weird saying that i'm proud of you, but i am. thank you for sharing the hard stuff, and i want you to know that we're helping carry your burden and praying for you big time. we'll be praying for scott as well. addiction sucks.
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